Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
Randomize
