But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
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