did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
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