well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize
