can we get nightvision for the apartment?
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
Randomize
