You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
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