my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
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