"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
Randomize
