After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
Randomize
