I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
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