dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
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