She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
