yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
Let's paint friendship bongs
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
Randomize
