You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
Randomize
