i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
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