if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
my god I love twenty year old dicks
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
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