Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
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