i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Randomize
