I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
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