Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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