You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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