wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
Randomize
