there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
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