just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
I'm just crazy horny about you
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
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