I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
She has the best kind of daddy issues
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Randomize
