Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
I'm just crazy horny about you
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
Randomize
