just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
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