So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Randomize
