the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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