i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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