you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
Mom said you looked used
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
Just woke up to Siri reminding me that i need to kill the giant orange spider in my room, because it's sorcery and witchcraft is sacrilegious. Did you give me LSD again!?!??!
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
Randomize
