Just mADE A PArabola og urine
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
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