Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.
I had better be fucking involved with step four.
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Randomize
