listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
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