a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
Randomize
