Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
Randomize
