I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
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