You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
Randomize
