I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
There's always time for handjobs
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
Randomize
