At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
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