Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
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