Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
there was 4 little kids screaming in high pitched voices at the top of their lungs at the sox game and their mom just leaned over to me and said 'if thats not birth control i dont know what is'
I am unfriending an ex-one night stand because his profile picture is of his wife's ultrasound.
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize
