Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
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