sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
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