Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
Randomize
