I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
Randomize
