Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize
