i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
im on a boat
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