My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
