Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Randomize
