is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
Judging by the garbled spelling in the calendar reminders in my phone, drunk me really wanted sober me to take a pregnancy test today.
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Randomize
