hotel room ftw
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
Dude, seriously, fucking stop introducing me as "Thomas, with the dick piercing." you are the worst wingman ever.
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
